OK, I'm experimenting. Here's an attempt at introducing the character Vor in an actual scene. Using the POV of a traveler, I'm hoping this gives enough of a visual and 'vibe' to be able to begin working with the character-- but not too much to blow any sense of mystery. At the end, I will mention a few things I hope came over in the scene. Let me know if it worked. Thanks!
Introducing Vor
The glade was drenched in both shadow and dew, the leaves dripped with the shedding rain and the ground underfoot pattered with the heavy splashes. I looked about, knowing something wasn’t right. I was being watched. It was the strangest of feelings.
“Come out, friend!”
There was a moment of painful silence. Then a soft laugh came from a nearby tree. A figure moved out shrouded by a heavy hooded cloak of the deepest maroon. I stood back and reached for my blade.
“Fear me not, traveler. You surprised me as much as I—you.”
Slowly and gracefully, a tall young man with burnished auburn tresses and beard descended the leaf strewn slope. There was a fine sword at his hip and under the concealing shroud, a stout grey cuirass and cuisses, ending in stout boots and gloves. His eyes settled on me, and all the while a slight frown insinuated a strange focus, as if the mind behind was analyzing all factors of my form and mind in a moment. I felt as if I had to apologise, and explain myself somehow - but he simply stretched out a hand bearing a brown corked bottle; a gift.
“Call me Vor. This woodland is cold and wet. What are you doing out here on such a day? I would invite you and your hound to our camp over the rise, if you like. We have a fire and food a-plenty. Take it please. It’s strong ale, proof against the chills.”
“Oh, I’m on my way to Nimueen to collect a bag of bread. What about you? Why are you out here encamped in the same terrible weather?”
“We stayed here overnight, investigating strange noises. We eliminated the cause and it roasts on the spit this very minute.”
“What was it?”
“A wailing boar. It must have been searching for new foraging grounds.”
“The folk in Hivin are no doubt going to get sleep tonight then. I’ve heard their screeching
carries for miles! How long had it been screaming?”
“A week or so.”
I cringed and shook my head with dismay. Vor silently nodded his agreement, and gestured with a sweep of his arm at the small camp and the bored knights poking at the fire and slicing cooked meat off the rotisserie.
“Please sit and take your fill. And pack some more to see you on your walk.”
I ate freshly roasted boar and drank numerous bottles of strong ale. The guards and their host said little, and when I was full and an hour had passed, the tall young knight suggested the camp be broken down and that they move on. With that, I took my leave, thanking him for his hospitality. I trudged onward to Nimueen pondering my unexpected good luck and full belly.
The knight, though perfectly well mannered and kind, left a strange feeling upon me as if something else was afoot in the woods. And no-one had asked my name or who I was. As if perhaps I’d been kept safe for an hour at a time when something else, much more important and not involving me had happened close by on the
shadow dappled road.
What I hoped to express
Vor is a mystical paladin, who secretly harbors a few psionic traits; though these he never admits to having. He only divulges operational information and never the motives or plans behind them. I'm hoping you felt this through the scene. Did I do it well or was I missing something? If you felt Vor was an enigma, that's a decent response. Thanks for any comments. As a solo writer without any external input, comments are precious. Image by GoogleImageFX.
Comments
Post a Comment